Waking up in a Graveyard

Every week I have the pleasure of spending some time with Gary. Gary is a friend of mine who I see once a week at the homeless food/clothing shelter. He's a brilliant guy and before the recession, he was the manager for a parts supply company. Since I have known him we have only had a surface relationship. Usually we just swap stories about how our week went and catch up, but this particular day was going to be different:

You see, this week I saw that Gary was wearing a Dallas Cowboys hat.

I thought I would ask him to come over to watch the game with me. He seemed a bit uncomfortable with the idea and told me, "I don't think that is a good idea, your family doesn't want a bum like me hangin around".

Gary, like most homeless people, has lost most of his self-confidence. After losing your marriage, job, home, car and everything else you once called your own, you might lose confidence in yourself as well... I bugged him until we finally settled on the idea that I would pick him up at the Dallas Public Library and we would just go to a restaurant to hang out and watch the game.

I met him at the library and we walked downtown to Campisi's. The place was pretty empty and we got a table right infront of the tv. We ordered a couple of drinks and as the first quarter of the game started, so did our conversations. Gary told me about his life and how he had given up on everything once he lost his job. He said his family was dead, except for his sister, but she lived too far away and was too poor to help him out all the time. Gary doesn't smoke, he doesn't drink, he doesn't do drugs, he is not mentally ill, and he doesn't enjoy being around the majority of this population at the shelters either. So he stays outside... by himself. For three years he has lived this way. He is stuck in the homeless rutt.

After the game, I told him I would get him a place to stay for the night because it was around 25 degrees. He wouldn't have any part of that conversation. He simply said, "It is degrading enough that you took me out to eat, there is no way I can let you do anything else". I responded, "Gary, I was just hanging out and watching the game with a good friend.. nothing shameful in that!" He told me that it was one of the only times he has sat down and eaten a meal in a restaurant since becoming homeless and he couldn't even remember the last time he was able to watch the Cowboys game on a tv, he usually just reads about the game in the paper the following day.

I gave Gary a ride "home" and I will never forget this moment of my life:

As we drove to the other side of Dallas (around the Fair Park area) Gary told me that he hears gunshots on a daily basis. "I am the only white person in this area and I used to get messed with, but they don't mess with me anymore because they figured out I don't ever have any money or drugs", He said. We finally pulled over where his "spot" was... in a graveyard. This is where he sleeps every night and this is where he wakes up every morning. Day after day. He told me that this was the most dangerous area of Dallas, so he usually rides the bus around until about 1 a.m. then comes to this area to sleep and wakes up about 4 a.m. so that he avoids any contact with dangerous people.


Gary needs help getting an ID card, assistance with a resume, minutes for his Virgin Mobile phone, a job and some good friends. Contact me if you would like to get involved.